This last week was dedicated to one thing: getting Avery to form good, healthy sleep habits. The plan was to lay low, hardly leave the house and focus on something that has become a major frustration in my life.
WARNING: This post is REALLY boring! Most of you won't have any desire to read all of this and that's fine ... keep in mind that my blog is also a way for me to keep a journal. One day, I might find it interesting to go back and read about our sleep issues. Now that I document everything in our lives, I felt this was worth documenting, regardless of whether or not others wanted to hear about it!
Most people tackle sleep issues in the first few months of their baby's life, but our life here at home has been thrown off a bit in the last 6 months, due to John's mother (Nila) moving in with us. Here's the scoop: we have 4 bedrooms: our master bedroom and the guest bedroom are on one side of our house, each with their own bathrooms attached. The other two rooms are on the opposite side, with a bathroom in the middle. One was Reagan's with a crib in it and the other has always been Nila's room. Nila used to live in this house when John lived in the city, then she moved back to her house in Union City shortly after I moved here 4 years ago. We always kept her room upstairs so that she could come stay with us for short periods of time (1 or 2 weeks). When Avery was born, the plan was to convert her room into a "big-girl" room for Reagan so that we could get her out of the crib and into a big-girl bed. Then we were going to move Avery into Reagan's old room with the crib.
After Avery was born, I had her in our bedroom, since she was getting up often during the night to eat. There was no sense in both John and I waking up every time Avery woke up, so I told John he should sleep in the guest bedroom so he wouldn't be disturbed by the nighttime feedings. At that point, John was in charge of watching the monitor for Reagan in her crib. When she would wake up during the night, he often brought her into the guest bedroom with him and they went back to sleep together. As you can probably guess, this started a very bad habit. Some nights they just went to sleep together and skipped the crib altogether. I'm sure most of you are cringing right now because in the world of parenting, it's a BIG NO-NO to let your kids sleep with you in your bed.
As you may have read in a previous post, Nila went into the hospital in January and was diagnosed with a new form of Leukemia called MDS. When she was released at the end of February, we knew she needed to live with us, so she moved into her bedroom upstairs. So, John and I just kept doing what was working at the time, Avery sleeping with me in my room, and Reagan sleeping with John in the guest room. You may be thinking, 'why didn't you just put Avery into Reagan's crib?' The answer is that I didn't want Reagan to feel like she no longer had a bed or a room of her own because her new little sister had taken it from her. I wanted to give her a new room to replace her old room, but I also wasn't ready to give up the guest room, since I love having a place for visitors to stay.
So, our first solution was to clean out the office downstairs and turn it into a bedroom for Nila, since the stairs weren't exactly ideal for her anyway. This was actually one of the reasons I wanted to have a garage sale was so we could get rid of lots of stuff from the office. The plan was to tackle this project in July after our trip to Salt Lake. But when we got back, the doctors gave John the news that Nila wasn't responding to the chemotherapy the way they'd hoped. This was disappointing information that left us feeling like we shouldn't up-root Nila from her bedroom at that time. So, we just kept doing things the same way, Avery with me and Reagan with John.
A few weeks ago, I started getting very frustrated with this situation. It was working before, but it wasn't anymore. Avery was having a harder time going to sleep and it was taking me a long time to soothe her to sleep each time she went down for a nap or for sleep at night. Nighttime sleep was getting really annoying because I'd get her to sleep, then leave her there by herself while I went downstairs to get stuff done. She'd wake up after 30 or 40 minutes crying and I'd have to go back upstairs to soothe her back to sleep. I'd finally get her back to sleep, and then she'd wake up 30 minutes later. It was clear that she needed me to be laying next to her for her to sleep soundly. This was the habit she'd gotten into. This constant waking would happen over and over and it was exhausting and frustrating for me. Most parents have time in the evening to get things done after their kids go to bed. I was feeling like all my time was spent putting Avery to sleep. To make matters worse, she started crawling, so I was watching her like a hawk on the monitor ... we piled pillows all around the outside of our king size bed, but she could get to the edge pretty quickly and it was becoming quite dangerous for her to sleep there. It was time for the crib.
I was really nervous about moving her to the crib for various reasons: 1) she was used to my bed, not the crib, 2) she was used to sleeping in my room, not Reagan's bedroom, 3) she was used to sleeping right next to me, not by herself, and 4) she was used to eating throughout the night, which would need to stop if I put her in the crib. I asked all my friends for advice: should I move the crib into my room for a couple nights to get her used to it in the familiar environment of my room? The concensus was that it was going to be traumatic for her no matter what, so I might as well do everything at once.
So, last Sunday night, I made myself a little bed on the floor of Avery's new room and made her sleep in the crib! My hope was that she wouldn't be as traumatized by the transition if I was in the room with her the first few nights. By Thursday night, my body was SO sore from sleeping on the floor, that I just had to return to my comfortable bed!
All in all, I'd say the transition was extremely successful. I think Avery actually enjoys her crib ... she always wakes up happy and if it weren't for the video monitor, I'd never know she was awake, since she hardly makes a sound when she wakes up from her naps. I'm so happy that I did it and wish I'd done it a lot sooner. Even if I'd done it 2 weeks earlier, it would have been SO much easier, since all she wanted to do was STAND UP, her new favorite activity! I feel a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders ~ what a wonderful, peaceful feeling! Last night, she went down just after 9 PM and didn't make a sound until just after 6 AM! 9 SOLID HOURS OF SLEEP!!!! Not bad!!
So ... if you've read up until this point, I'm impressed! If you're not bored to tears yet, this next part will put you to sleep. Of course, I had to keep detailed notes throughout this process, so I was typing away on my iPhone all week. Honestly, don't bother reading them - I'm only posting them so I'll have them in the future.
- Avery's Crib Transition - NOTES
Sunday Night Aug 3
8:00 gave bottle 5 oz
8:05 put in crib - crawled around, stood up for about 10 minutes - I lay on the floor saying "go to sleep"
8:15 she started crying - I sung and rubbed her back and stomach - lay down for a few minutes with my hand in the crib
8:25 she finally fell asleep - too tired to move around anymore or sit up - lay on her back while I rubbed her tummy and sang
9:13 screamed for 30 minutes
9:40 started calming down - quiet for a few minutes, then screaming again - tons of snot, so breathing from her mouth - then lots of drool. Up and down - asleep then screaming - back and forth
10:45 gave her decongestant
11:10 finally asleep (up for almost 2 hours)
2:19 woke up - up and down, over and over
3:12 finally asleep (up for almost 1 hour)
6:25 woke up - I figured she had to be hungry, so I took her out and nursed her- she ate on both sides - let her fall back to sleep next to me on the floor
9:30 up for the day
10:30 very tired - nursed her then put in crib awake - didn't cry, just kept trying to sit up - rubbed back 'til she fell asleep around 11:00
11:45 woke up
3:10 nursed her to sleep then transferred to crib
5:50 woke up!
Monday Night Aug 4th
9:00 fell asleep in John's arms
9:15 we woke her up
9:55 gave 5 oz bottle
10:04 put in crib - happy - crawling around, standing up and laughing - I kept picking up and putting down over and over - she never cried!
10:50 finally fell asleep with me rubbing her back - no crying!
1:11 woke up - immediately rubbed back
1:28 asleep.
3:30 cry - binkie, rubbed back - done
4:55 cry - same as 3:30
7:05 woke up - nursed on one side, then she was wide awake. Played for a little while then got tired - fell asleep in my arms around 7:35
7:40 put down in crib
8:38 awake - nursed her back to sleep next to me
9:55 awake - nursed again
11:45 put in crib - crawled around and stood up over and over - finally passed out at 12:10
1:30 woke up happy
4:00 nursed to sleep
4:45 woke up - happy but sleepy
6:30 cat nap in the swing
Tuesday Night Aug 5th
8:43 bottle
8:52 in crib - climbing
9:08 asleep
9:56 woke up crying - gave binkie, rubbed back - done
11:10 whimpered, then put herself back to sleep
12:30 woke up - sat up and started crying - gave binkie, rubbed back
5:45 woke up, wide awake - took her to glider and nursed her only on one side - awake, so I rocked her a little
5;59 put in crib awake, figured she'd put up a fight, but she just turned over and went to sleep after only a few minutes of back rubbing. I was elated - 6:04 and already time to go back to sleep - just as I was getting my phone to write notes on how incredibly smoothly it had gone, she startled and woke up. Play time. Picked up, put down, over and over - a few short cries (more like quick protests). She was tired but couldn't fall asleep. Didn't help that the room kept getting brighter. Lots of back rubbing
7:05 after an hour of standing at her crib, I gave up :( took her out, lay down and nursed her - then she wanted to crawl around and play. So I sat in glider and rocked her to sleep.
7:37 put in crib asleep
8:15 woke up wide awake ... I was so tired I brought her to floor with me ... I got up at 8:50 and left her there
10:30 woke up for the day
12:55 nursed her to sleep
1:05 put in crib
1:50 woke up - wouldn't go back to sleep -took downstairs to play
2:20 tried to put to sleep - tired but restless - put up a big fight
3:10 - finally gave up and nursed her then rocked her to sleep
3:20 - put in crib
3:37 - she woke up :(
5:00 nursed her to sleep
5:30 put in crib
7:00 awake
Wednesday Night Aug 6th - CIO #1
9:33 gave bottle 4 oz
9:41 put in crib and left the room - no crying
9:50 started "shouting" for me, so I went in for about 90 seconds, then left again ... A few whimpers when I left
9:57 went in after she cried a little - so tired, but fighting sleep. Started crying as soon as I left the room ... Let her cry about 5 minutes
10:02 went back up-soothed her to sleep (only took a couple minutes) then left
10:10 as soon as I got back downstairs, she startled and woke up -hysterical. Went right back in and soothed her right back to sleep
11:00 woke up crying and sitting up - went in and soothed her back to sleep (about 5 minutes)
2:25 woke up - wide awake - moved all around crib.
3:10 still awake - I'm going crazy!
3:47 still awake - ready to slit my wrists!
4:40 finally asleep
5:17 awake - gave binkie
7:00 awake, brought to floor and nursed one side
7:54 woke up, so I nursed the other side
8:36 moved back to crib
9:43 awake
11:35 napped in the car
12:00 woke up
2:40 fell asleep in car, then I transferred her to crib
4:00 woke up - wide awake, but visibly tired
7:00 nursed to sleep, put in crib
8:15 woke up
Thursday Night Aug 7th - CIO #2 – First night back in my bed
9:40 gave bottle 5 oz
9:48 left her room
9:50 started screaming
9:52 went in and soothed her
9:54 started screaming again
9:58 went in and soothed her - rubbed back and sang for 2-3 minutes - she went right to sleep
10:12 woke up screaming
10:15 went in and soothed her back to sleep
1:32 cried - gave binkie, went right back to sleep
5:00 cried a little but put herself back to sleep
5:30 Reagan woke up, so I went to her room - while I was in there, Avery woke up, started screaming - John went to her room, but she stopped by the time he got to the door - went back to sleep on her own.
6:35 woke up, sitting up. Picked her up and nursed to sleep in glider
7:00 transferred to crib
10:00 woke up happy
11:40 John gave bottle, put down. She cried, so he went up, rocked her to sleep by 12:00
12:40 woke up
2:15 nursed her, then put in crib awake but very tired. Left room - panicked look as I left, yet no cry. Let out a few protest cries while crawling around
2:24 went in - saw me and gave a huge grin, like she thought I was coming in to get her out. I lay her down and she was upset. When I left she screamed bloody murder
2:32 went in, tried to soothe and sing, but she was worked up - now putting up a huge fight. Felt like the best thing to do was leave again, see if she'd cry-it-out to sleep this time ... If not calm by 2:43, I'll go in again.
2:40 - 2:46 lay down on her own, let out a few moans, then fell asleep
3:40 woke up crying - I went in and soothed her back to sleep
5:30 woke up
Friday Night Aug 8th - CIO #3
8:50 gave bottle in glider - 8 oz!! Stood up and burped her on my shoulder which caused her to fall asleep
9:02 put in crib asleep, but she let out a few cries ... Cried as I left the room, but gave in to sleep
11:40 woke up crying, so John soothed her, left the room and let her cry for about 5 minutes, went back up, soothed her again, left room around 11:55 and watched her put herself to sleep right after.
5:05 woke up - wide awake. Soothed, put down, left room. She wasn't going back to sleep and since I was already up, I went back in. Changed diaper (rather full and felt cold, so I was worried it was making her bottom cold), then nursed on both sides. Still awake but tired.
5:40 put back in crib - protested when I left room, standing up when I checked monitor, but she quickly lay herself down
5:48 standing up crying, so I went in, lay her down, gave binkie, soothed, then left room
5:50 watched her on monitor - she sat up, cried a little, then lay down
9:30 woke up happy
11:45 fell asleep in stroller until 12:15
3:00 john put her down for a nap
5:30 woke up
Saturday Night Aug 9th - CIO # 4
9:00 gave bottle - 6 oz, put in crib
9:13 left room - heard a few protest screams, but she was asleep by the time I went downstairs and checked the monitor
1:45 ... I'm going to sleep now, but I had to comment on how I left her in her crib just after 9pm and I haven't had to go back in there once!!
6:08 woke up, but only made a few small cries .. Watched on monitor, but wouldn't go back to sleep
6:13 went in and nursed her on one side - fell asleep in my arms
6:40 transferred back to crib, but she woke up - spent next 20 minutes soothing her, then she woke up
6:59 didn't know what to do, so I left the room - she cried for a few minutes but calmed down
7:05 went back in - lay her down, soothed her for a few minutes, then left - cried when I left. Kept standing up
7:16 went in again and lay her down ... She was so sleepy, so I figured I'd stay there until she was asleep so I wouldn't have to keep walking back and forth to her room ... Stood at her crib until 7:42
8:30 woke up
11:15 nursed her in glider
11:20 put in crib
1:05 woke up
Avery was awake for 3 hours, happy as I've ever seen her. She ate 1/2 a container of stage 2 spring vegetables (peas, spinach and rice), and almost a whole container of Yo Baby yogurt. Then she sat happily in the high chair snacking on finger foods (cheerios and yogurt melts) while I cooked. Then I put her on the floor of the toy room and she crawled all over, exploring the various toys, standing up everywhere she could pull herself up, happy on her own (with me coming in and out of the room while doing laundry, dishes, computer, etc) for an hour and a half
4:05 nursed in glider
4:15 put in crib wide awake but sleepy and left room. Screamed in protest.
4:20 still crying and standing so I went in, soothed her, rubbed back
4:24 left room - she was almost asleep
5:15 woke up - John tried to soothe back to sleep, but she wouldn't sleep - got her up until bedtime
Sunday Night Aug 10th - CIO #5
8:00 John gave bottle (5oz)
8:15 put in crib ... Put up a small fight, but she was so tired she fell right to sleep
2:30 woke up screaming. Couldn't settle down, so I picked her up and nursed her to sleep in glider
3:00 put back in crib asleep
8:20 woke up
Once again, I entered all the information of friends and family members into the address book, as well as everyone's birthdays into the calendar. This was a convenient place to store all of this important information, until of course, I forgot to charge it and I lost everything.
